Search found 2692 matches
- 27 Nov 2020, 23:35
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: All Lives Matter
- Replies: 3
- Views: 8248
Re: All Lives Matter
A nice uplifting poem....enjoyed, Michael
- 24 Nov 2020, 23:18
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Moving Heaven
- Replies: 3
- Views: 6597
Re: Moving Heaven
Strong poem. I like "infected with righteousness." The closing 2 lines work well, especially with the reference of "rice".
inculcated the locals with
doctrine and dogma and rice.
inculcated the locals with
doctrine and dogma and rice.
- 22 Nov 2020, 22:11
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
- Replies: 9
- Views: 12416
Re: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
Thanks, Ken. Michael, I like your suggestion...I'll think about it.
- 22 Nov 2020, 10:10
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
- Replies: 9
- Views: 12416
Re: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
Ken, I appreciate your comment. Can I bug you one more time and ask you to point out the lines in v2 that are telling? Appreciate it. Bob
- 19 Nov 2020, 09:10
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
- Replies: 9
- Views: 12416
Re: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
Thanks, Ken, for your help and honesty. I have reworked the poem with your advice in mind. Unfortunately, the poem is even longer. But it is told from another person's viewpoint, his wife's. Let me know what you think. I always value your opinion.
- 19 Nov 2020, 02:55
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
- Replies: 9
- Views: 12416
Re: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
Ken, thx for commenting. Fiddle with it how? I'm open to any suggestions.
- 17 Nov 2020, 22:16
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Beethoven Plays for Mozart
- Replies: 9
- Views: 12416
Beethoven Plays for Mozart
v2: Beethoven Plays for Mozart I was busy, in the middle of packing, our no longer affordable rent due. Wolferl was feverishly working on Don Giovanni , its score strewn about the floor. “ What now? ” he asked, exasperated at Gaukerl’s barking. An intruder walked through the door— a sixteen year old...
- 15 Nov 2020, 04:43
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: While I Was Burning
- Replies: 4
- Views: 8619
Re: While I Was Burning
I'm not sure what the poem's about, but I really like the tone of it, especially these lines...said with so much confidence
I told you I'd love you as best
I can and that's all there is to it.
I told you I'd love you as best
I can and that's all there is to it.
- 13 Nov 2020, 23:57
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Theresia Constanzia Adelheid Friedericke Maria Anna Mozart
- Replies: 2
- Views: 6222
Theresia Constanzia Adelheid Friedericke Maria Anna Mozart
Theresia Constanzia Adelheid Friedericke Maria Anna Mozart With Johann I constantly itched, and my lower back ached from carrying a hill up a mountain. I could feel his feet nudge me for sweets, sweets, sweets--and me hungry the way I once was for Wolferl’s kisses. I knew he was a boy the way he kic...
- 13 Nov 2020, 23:57
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Long Hair Named Desire
- Replies: 6
- Views: 10698
Re: Long Hair Named Desire
Lovely. Your imagery is good, pleasing. Enjoyed immensely
- 09 Nov 2020, 01:02
- Forum: Writer's Block Palaver
- Topic: Congrats to IBPC Poem of the Year winners (May 2019-Apr 2020):
- Replies: 2
- Views: 7258
Re: Congrats to IBPC Poem of the Year winners (May 2019-Apr 2020):
Congrats, Ken!!! Well deserved
- 08 Nov 2020, 22:33
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Shivapuranam
- Replies: 2
- Views: 6534
Re: Shivapuranam
I like the idea of gods being flawed like the rest of us, enjoying the same things....My only suggestion...when you have a chance at imagery versus telling, go for the image...for example, the line enjoying conjugality, give us a picture of a couple or friends raising toasts, slipping an arm around ...
- 03 Nov 2020, 22:10
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: October still-life : "I am with you always"
- Replies: 2
- Views: 6608
Re: October still-life : "I am with you always"
well done, Michael
- 02 Nov 2020, 01:24
- Forum: Writer's Block Palaver
- Topic: Upcoming November IBPC 2020:
- Replies: 14
- Views: 22668
Re: Upcoming November IBPC 2020:
I am not available this month but I am happy to nominate Meenas’ poem “ Navaratri”,
Billy’s “ Antlers” ( a tough choice, Billy... so many good ones to pick from”,
Michael’s “ I am always with you”.
Billy’s “ Antlers” ( a tough choice, Billy... so many good ones to pick from”,
Michael’s “ I am always with you”.
- 31 Oct 2020, 23:16
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Sunflowers
- Replies: 11
- Views: 16207
Re: Sunflowers
revised the ending
- 31 Oct 2020, 21:44
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Antlers
- Replies: 3
- Views: 7258
Re: Antlers
I am amazed and wowed how often your poems bloom naturally into such surprising and lovely endings. This piece does this as well. Kudos
- 30 Oct 2020, 21:16
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Floods Down The Road
- Replies: 4
- Views: 8497
Re: Floods Down The Road
Fine poem, Meenas. Good imagery, from cars floating to the toppled rice(an image I love)....If you want me to nitpick I will, but I just want to enjoy this strong piece...
cooked rice topples over
seemingly like offerings
to water Gods.
cooked rice topples over
seemingly like offerings
to water Gods.
- 29 Oct 2020, 22:11
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: String of Flowers
- Replies: 4
- Views: 8600
Re: String of Flowers
I like the tone of this poem, and the flow. It would be stronger if it relied more on imagery and less on telling, though. As an exercise, try using just imagery to convey the same scene and emotions. William Carlos Williams often uses images alone, as in "Flowers by the Sea". Flowers by the Sea By ...
- 27 Oct 2020, 08:12
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: To My Old Age
- Replies: 9
- Views: 13409
Re: To My Old Age
Thx, Michael
- 27 Oct 2020, 08:10
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Nature of Man
- Replies: 5
- Views: 9098
Re: Nature of Man
Improved but it’s “Navaratri” that stands out. I plan to nominate it. If you want to tweak it between now and then, this is a heads up...
- 27 Oct 2020, 05:32
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Return of the fox revised
- Replies: 10
- Views: 15418
Re: Return of the fox revised
It’s better
- 26 Oct 2020, 04:56
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: Nature of Man
- Replies: 5
- Views: 9098
Re: Nature of Man
I like “Navarati” because of its imagery. Consider some imagery for this poem as well.
- 26 Oct 2020, 04:53
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: To My Old Age
- Replies: 9
- Views: 13409
Re: To My Old Age
The title keeps bothering me....dunno
- 24 Oct 2020, 21:57
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: To My Old Age
- Replies: 9
- Views: 13409
Re: Addressing My Old Age
Thank you, Ken. Your opinion means a lot.
- 24 Oct 2020, 04:42
- Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
- Topic: To My Old Age
- Replies: 9
- Views: 13409
Re: Addressing My Old Age
Changed the title....not sure I like it...but open to suggestions. Best