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Morning Glory
Posted: 01 Oct 2016, 03:47
by Billy
Morning Glory
Their leaves
large and small hearts
climbing the wall
of hatred--
the royal purple
of a new day.
Re: Morning Glory
Posted: 13 Oct 2016, 22:20
by Bernie01
Billy---
i like the poem best with this edit:
Their leaves
large and small hearts
climbing the wall
the royal purple
of a new day.
hatred is too strong.
what do you think?
but more, i hope, haiku like.
bernie
Re: Morning Glory
Posted: 17 Oct 2016, 16:39
by EricRomm
Hello.
Yes, hatred sounds too harsh.
Re: Morning Glory
Posted: 18 Oct 2016, 08:29
by Michael (MV)
Hi Billy,
workshop sharing these distilled to 3 lines less than 17 syllables
Michael (MV)
leaves large and small hearts
purple upon the wall --
Morning Glory
leaves large and small hearts
the wall falls to purple --
Morning Glory
leaves large and small hearts
the wall appears purple --
Morning Glory
leaves large and small hearts
purple reigns the wall --
Morning Glory
Re: Morning Glory
Posted: 20 Oct 2016, 01:07
by BobBradshaw
I like the idea of a haiku here as well....I like Michael's first try at it:
leaves large and small hearts
purple upon the wall --
Morning Glory