Cowboy Novel in Japanese

[Bernie01]

It's the first line of my new western:

Morning painted the color of a jewel
worn by a Navajo woman marking
a tourist ledger in Arizona.

Later, the Asahi Shimbun translates
my cowboy story as a long word
in Japanese meaning:

girl with p e a c o c k wings in blue dusk over Kobe.


I pose beside my cowboy books.

A swan like a great wheel passing.

[Michael (MV)]

 
Hi bernie,
  

the good the bad the ugly

& the beautiful


in the way your poem articulates itself recalls to me this one by Robert Bly:

http://loc.gov/poetry/180/040.html





Michael (MV)

 

 
 
 
 
  
 
 

[FranktheFrank]

I've seen this one before Bernie, liked it then and now
it is truncated somewhat,
sorry but I can't remember what is missing,
I know I enjoyed it.

[Bernie01]

thanks...i enjoy a literal statement among the fragments...think how Ulysses opens: "Plump Buck Mulligan...."



Driving to Town Late to Mail a Letter

It is a cold and snowy night. The main street is deserted.
The only things moving are swirls of snow.
As I lift the mailbox door, I feel its cold iron.
There is a privacy I love in this snowy night.
Driving around, I will waste more time.

—Robert Bly


Frank---


wanted to put the original poem on a diet....


thanks to you both for commenting.


bernie



the original:


Its the first line of my new western:

Morning painted the color of a jewel
worn by a Navajo woman marking
a ledger in Arizona.

Later, the Asahi Shimbun translates
my cowboy story as a long word
in Japanese meaning:

girl with peacock wings in blue dusk over Kobe.


Poetry Kanto* is fascinated by the novel's blue color
and creates an image:

Blue the color of ocean water
after passage of a Caribbean ship.


Kyoto graduate students of English Literature summarized the novel:

Wooden sidewalks and flimsy buildings
blowing away and the old cowboy
who would never again ride the fading
edge of a vast blue horizon.


In conversing with an interviewer I add:

Homeless blue color spots the horse,
scrub cows and the lazed cowboy
like a solo saxophone from a radio.


The last page I recite in Hiroshima:

The gunfire deafened him
and he did not hear his own heavy,
Colt sidearm fire but saw blue smoke
rise from the barrel as from a gap in the earth.

[FranktheFrank]

I nominate this poem for this month's IBPC.

[harry567]

I really like the strong, action verbs in this poem. I like the use of colors as well. To get more emotion into the poem, you may want to get the narrator personally involved from the poem's beginning. That could give the final death a more personal impact...


วิธีเล่นบาคาร่า

[Bernie01]

H---


good idea, i'll develop that POV.

thanks for your time and comment.


bernie