Naming The Beasts

[Kenneth2816]

In the beginning he had no frame
of progeny, no personal history.
Just a man, new-made,
risen from mud, alone.

Glimpses of them in the underbrush,
foraging the tall grasses, tops of trees,

creatures like him insomuch
that they moved, lived,
and breathed, but it ended there.

At dusk he struck a fire for light,
the moon not being yet full, sat back
on his haunches beneath a tree and waited.

They came limb-to-limb and by air.
Some lumbered or crawled, walked
by two's to present themselves to the man,

lay down at his feet, for fear had
not yet entered into the world.

The man studied each face, probed it
with his fingers as a blind man does,
stroked muzzles, snouts, manes,
and tail in order to discern each
creature's measure of the Divine.

He stood an pronounced its name,
strking the earth with a stick:

Thunders when walking

Carries young on it's back

Runs in circles

Drops down from above

At first light, it was finished.
The man lay exhausted, thinking
perhaps he had failed, for he knew a
forlorness that was alien.

Seeing that each creature had a mate,
He thought inwardly, "birds have nests,
foxes have holes, but the man
has no breast upon which to lay his head."

Then he feel into a deep sleep.

[Bernie01]

Smoothly developed, very nice word selection.


the idea is a big one, the poem does not allow that fact to rule and insists on being a poem. good.


bernie




Then he feel into a deep sleep.

Then he fell into a deep sleep.

[BobBradshaw]

I like this fresh retelling of an old subject...quite enjoyable

[FranktheFrank]

Ancient indeed
well worth telling.
The part where man fell asleep was inspired.
Well done.

[Billy]

Very good from beginning to end. I'll nom. It for IBPC.

[Kenneth2816]

Bernie Bob Frank Billy.

Thank you. I wrote this as a prequel to an earlier poem about God withdrawing a rib from Adam. I love poems with Biblical themes

Billy thank you for the nom. Coming from you, it means a lot

[Billy]

Thanks Kenneth, but you were writing good poems long before me back at Melic. I was just a newbie writing some pretty bad stuff, learning the ropes.