Rehearsal

[BobBradshaw]

   Rehearsal


    He stands upright, listing right
    and left as if our orchestra

    were a floundering ship,
    his  long, grey hair flailing 

    in the air's salt.  Suddenly
    he stops and asks,  What the hell

    happened to the allegro?
    He demands music be precise,

   like the uniform creases
   on a parade ground.

    One guilty violin bursts
    into sobs but abruptly

    stops.  We're like strangers
    sharing a lifeboat.  We look up

    at him as if only he can turn
    the crank, lowering us

    into the sea's safe lap.
    He sighs heavily.  We're children

    waiting out our father's
    rant.  Finally he picks up

    the baton, and waves it again,
    determined to save not only

    our reputations but
    Vivaldi's, too.

[Bernie01]

Bob---


a building of notes into a four seasons of poem...

masterful and patient building, layering.

What the hell

happened to the allegro?
He demands music be precise,

like the uniform creases
on a parade ground.



only he can turn
the crank, lowering us

into the sea's safe lap.
He sighs heavily.

love that safe lap.




and the master close bringing it all together:


determined to save not only

our reputations but
Vivaldi's, too.


terrific poem.

bernie


Four Seasons

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRxofEmo3HA

[LindaLinda]

really enjoyed this, the clear images of the conductor and all the details capturing the rough sea, and the lowering of the life boat into the seas safe lap. Love the analogy, Nice work.

[Michael (MV)]

 
Hi Bob

esp liked:

" . . We're like strangers
sharing a lifeboat."




Michael (MV) 
 
 
 
 
 

[Kenneth2816]

Bob. Imho, this is the best poem of yours I've read. Ring of truth.

Syntax would demand that when saying "we", it must be followed by "our" instead of
their.

[BobBradshaw]

Thanks, everyone, for commenting...Bob

[capricorn]

Hi Bob,

I think this is brilliant with all its sea references too. There are many lines to like, too many to mention.
Love 'the sea's safe lap' Great work.

Eira

[BobBradshaw]

Capricorn, thanks--I appreciate it....best, Bob

[Michael (MV)]

 
Hi again Bob,


w/out the "and asks" & w/  "     "

. . . Suddenly
he stops, "What the hell

happened to the allegro? "



The conductor & the orchestra
are not going to go down
with the ship - Vivaldi - that is staying afloat




Michael (MV)

 
 
 
 
 

[BobBradshaw]

Thanks, Michael and Capricorn....I appreciate it....best