Tenderly He Carries Her into the Pool
in his arms
as if carrying her across
the threshold of his apartment
the day they married,
lowering her gently,
the water hugging her waist,
the weight of her wasted body
forgotten
adrift, as light as a kickboard,
till he lifts her again,
high enough for a kiss,
their lips touching
like the day of their vows,
when the world for just
a moment shyly broke
into grins.
Tenderly He Carries Her into the Pool
Re: Tenderly He Carries Her into the Pool
Bob---
A wonderful poem that illustrates most of what i feel about poetry:
understated emotion, a layered narrative plot that unfolds and reveals itself with each new verse, and showing, showing showing...
the poem begins with a novel image that is both familiar and new because it is shared so intimately with the reader.
and injury, that "wasted body." the vulnerability of the poem.
the three images, three perhaps, including the title that nest in the poem so artfully they are felt and not noticed:
1. Tenderly He Carries Her into the Pool
2. in his arms
as if carrying her across
the threshold of his apartment
the day they married,
3 adrift, as light as a kickboard
the declarative close, in the same achieved tone and nested narrative as the body of the poem:
like the day of their vows,
when the world for just
a moment shyly broke
into grins.
a poem i enjoy reading, thinking about and feeling deeply.
bernie
A wonderful poem that illustrates most of what i feel about poetry:
understated emotion, a layered narrative plot that unfolds and reveals itself with each new verse, and showing, showing showing...
the poem begins with a novel image that is both familiar and new because it is shared so intimately with the reader.
and injury, that "wasted body." the vulnerability of the poem.
the three images, three perhaps, including the title that nest in the poem so artfully they are felt and not noticed:
1. Tenderly He Carries Her into the Pool
2. in his arms
as if carrying her across
the threshold of his apartment
the day they married,
3 adrift, as light as a kickboard
the declarative close, in the same achieved tone and nested narrative as the body of the poem:
like the day of their vows,
when the world for just
a moment shyly broke
into grins.
a poem i enjoy reading, thinking about and feeling deeply.
bernie
-
- Posts: 2691
- Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03
Re: Tenderly He Carries Her into the Pool
Thank you, Bernie....your encouragement is money I'm putting away for hard times....best
-
- Posts: 1619
- Joined: 01 Jun 2008, 09:17
Re: Tenderly He Carries Her into the Pool
Bob. Line breaks are superior here. The plain, simple use of language is also very good. Excellent close. Well done without an avalanche of emotion.
Nice work
Nice work
-
- Posts: 2691
- Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03
Re: Tenderly He Carries Her into the Pool
Thanks, Ken....appreciate your read