New York Pitch Conference Reviews, Algonkian Writer Conferences, and Poetry Forums

Emily Dickinson, In Love

Though never spoken of
marriage had been in the air—

as inevitable as pollen--
or birdsong in mid-summer.

Imagine when she heard—
Henry—engaged—

her heart's chandelier--
wrecked on the heart's floor.

revised

Bob

I am not quite sure about the 'heart's floor'.It sounds contrived.

Siva

I “borrowed” that image from an Emily Dickinson poem...wanted to make the poem more authentic. However, that doesn’t keep it from sounding contrived in this poem. Thx for commenting,Siva

Bob

Now I understand.It is ----------.(I forget the word,there is a term for it,we learnt it in literature) I didn't realize you were trying to be authentic to Dicksonian Poetry, Let me read and reread it, and maybe I will get used to it.

Siva

Bob
Nice imagery here.

as inevitable as pollen
or birdsong in mid-summer.

You need a full stop at the end of the poem, after 'loose.'

Thx, Siva....the period at the end has been rolled into place. By the way, happy new year, and may you write many wonderful poems in 2020....best, Bob

Bob,

It is Pongal season now. The15th was Pongal for the Sun God,The 16th Pongal for the cattle,17th the Sight-seeing Pongal.And thank you for your good heart.

Siva

major trim....