The Hag

[Kenneth2816]

I watched her die twenty six times
on the beach, dressed her wounds
with a poultice of fig and seaweed,

scattered her books and drawings
so that anyone who happened by
would think her a sea witch.

By morning, ghost crabs had taken
her toes. Their intumescent shells
looked blue beneath the moonlight.

*Title suggested by comment from Bob.*

[BobBradshaw]

Lovely images. Strong, unusual theme that’s very attractive.

[Kenneth2816]

Thanks Bob

[Kenneth2816]

We watched her die nine times
each more beautiful than the last

on the beach, dressed her wounds
with a poultice of fish brine and seaweed.

I scattered her books and drawings
so that anyone who happened by

would think her a sea-witch.
We made a signal fire to warn

off ships at sea, sat with her
drinking all night, watched the tide

gently rock her like a mother.
Her long hair lifted and splayed.

[BobBradshaw]

I like both versions. Both are so different in tone. Which do you prefer?

[Kenneth2816]

The second. It may be one of those poems that continues to evolve because there id already another revision in my head

[Michael (MV)]

Always a work-in-progress; therefore, editing is an on-going process.

From the best of both, another revision


Michael (MV)

[BobBradshaw]

Another revision? Go for it!

[Kenneth2816]

Maybe at some future point

[Billy]

Yes, I saw Bob's comment and have been unable to find The Hag by Hughes. Would like to read his.

Your poem is very good.

[Kenneth2816]

Thank you Billy