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by Kenneth2816
23 Jul 2019, 05:50
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Partnering
Replies: 7
Views: 147

Re: Partnering

Good imagery. My late wife was an accomplished ballet dancer so I can appreciate the terminology
by Kenneth2816
21 Jul 2019, 22:17
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Kadaneri Ayyanar
Replies: 6
Views: 146

Re: Kadaneri Ayyanar

Once again, an intriguing poem. I looked him up saw many photos. You want to correct physic with physique.
by Kenneth2816
20 Jul 2019, 01:12
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Church of Pain V2
Replies: 7
Views: 242

Re: Church of Pain V2

Revised
by Kenneth2816
20 Jul 2019, 00:24
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Church of Pain V2
Replies: 7
Views: 242

Re: Church of Pain

Ok. Thanks Eira
by Kenneth2816
19 Jul 2019, 13:47
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Visiting Sandburg's Homeplace
Replies: 6
Views: 796

Re: Visiting Sandburg's Homeplace

Gloria Patri. It was s typo, my bad. Creak is correct .It's a sound .Thank you again Bob
by Kenneth2816
19 Jul 2019, 13:41
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Church of Pain V2
Replies: 7
Views: 242

Re: Church of Pain

Thanks Meenas
by Kenneth2816
18 Jul 2019, 23:31
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Church of Pain V2
Replies: 7
Views: 242

Re: Church of Pain

Thanks for reading Bob.Any poem that needs explaining fails, imho.
by Kenneth2816
18 Jul 2019, 00:28
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Church of Pain V2
Replies: 7
Views: 242

Church of Pain V2

Jesus carves a hollow in you, builds Himself a place to live. Scuttling ushers take up offering, ransom for the rebel King. When my time comes I'll bite the biscuit, wash it with a sup of wine. Tell Mother Mary how I'm sorry to have hurt her baby boy. He carves a hollow in the breast, crawls inside ...
by Kenneth2816
18 Jul 2019, 00:27
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Visiting Sandburg's Homeplace
Replies: 6
Views: 796

Re: Visiting Sandburg's Homeplace

Thank you Billy. It's been a bit slow.
by Kenneth2816
17 Jul 2019, 05:34
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: It’ll Grow Back
Replies: 5
Views: 275

Re: It’ll Grow Back

Clever
by Kenneth2816
16 Jul 2019, 23:21
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Song of the Drowned
Replies: 3
Views: 264

Re: Song of the Drowned

Thank you guys. This just popped into my head
by Kenneth2816
16 Jul 2019, 13:05
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Kite Flying
Replies: 4
Views: 258

Re: Kite Flying

To me this is a good example of "show, don't tell " we learn a lot about this couple, their dynamic. N places himself in a subordinate role, never quite measuring up but willing to mollify, to run faster,try harder, and his fear he may lose her is ever present, despite his best effort . I love " rei...
by Kenneth2816
14 Jul 2019, 08:27
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Song of the Drowned
Replies: 3
Views: 264

Song of the Drowned

We all live in a yellow submarine. Aeons of war and shipwreck have left our bones scattered across ocean floors the way a reckless child strews sticks. We rise from the tangle of spars and masts, reassemble ourselves like tinker toys, don skin and clothes, revisit the world of men just long enough f...
by Kenneth2816
14 Jul 2019, 08:08
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Our Parents
Replies: 3
Views: 255

Re: Our Parents

I get where you're going. I think the choice of descriptions don't carry the poem. I suggest better metaphors or if you need to keep them, add a stanza or two. As is, it's fairly sterile for such an emotional subject
by Kenneth2816
08 Jul 2019, 11:35
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: #revolutionarywarstory
Replies: 4
Views: 508

Re: #revolutionarywarstory

I don't know what is worse. A mentally unfit president or those who cover for him
by Kenneth2816
07 Jul 2019, 14:14
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: #revolutionarywarstory
Replies: 4
Views: 508

#revolutionarywarstory

My ancestor was a tail gunner
He was awarded the Distinguished Flying Cross
During the Battle of LAX in 1775.

They had a pinup of Ivanka
painted on the plane.
Show some respect.
by Kenneth2816
04 Jul 2019, 21:14
Forum: Writer's Block Palaver
Topic: Upcoming July IBPC 2019:
Replies: 21
Views: 866

Re: Upcoming July IBPC 2019:

Good luck
by Kenneth2816
03 Jul 2019, 13:41
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Children Tour Monterey Bay Aquarium
Replies: 7
Views: 1354

Re: Children from a Burn Ward Tour Monterey Bay Aquarium

I'm predicting a place in IBPC on this Bob. Bet money.
by Kenneth2816
03 Jul 2019, 09:55
Forum: Writer's Block Palaver
Topic: Upcoming July IBPC 2019:
Replies: 21
Views: 866

Re: Upcoming July IBPC 2019:

Im going to third your poem Michael. IBPC has been very generous to me. I appreciate your seconding behind your own poem. Very selfless.
by Kenneth2816
03 Jul 2019, 00:10
Forum: Writer's Block Palaver
Topic: Upcoming July IBPC 2019:
Replies: 21
Views: 866

Re: Upcoming July IBPC 2019:

You got three if Siva accepts
by Kenneth2816
02 Jul 2019, 19:58
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Mahaaprasthaana
Replies: 3
Views: 611

Re: Mahaaprasthaana

Above my pay grade
by Kenneth2816
02 Jul 2019, 18:44
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Visiting Sandburg's Homeplace
Replies: 6
Views: 796

Re: Visiting Sandburg's Homeplace

Thank you Bob. Rarely do I annotate a poem .This was an assignment for a local magazine. They accepted it if I would remove " pissing". I decided not too. Appreciate your support

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