Search found 1577 matches

by Kenneth2816
27 Sep 2016, 15:37
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Removed for Submissions
Replies: 2
Views: 7389

Re: Moriah

I like biblical poems.To my ear, phrases like "whisper of doubt" and "window of light" tend a bit to cliche and disallow a chance to set this piece off. I'm not sure cryptocrystalline adds anything, but it sounds neat. I'd consider the God who laughs instead of He. This is a fairly straightforward t...
by Kenneth2816
27 Sep 2016, 15:27
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: 9-15-2001   (a song of experience)
Replies: 3
Views: 9873

Re: 9-15-2001   (a song of experience)

I like the compression.I like the combination of mental pictures coupled with the emotion this evokes. I might suggest changing son to boy, and father to daddy. A kid like that prolly would not use the more formal term. I like how you DONT include to whom the boy is speaking. This allows the kids an...