Living At The End Of The Road
Living At The End Of The Road
Living At The End Of The Road
Sagebrush somersaults across the open
plain like fragrant spinning stars of Van Gogh.
It's windy in Wyoming. Suicide weather.
No barriers to stop it. They say the telephone
pole is the state tree. Miles without the living.
Lots of drive-up liquor stores. Abandoned
mining towns. Petroglyphs of alien figures.
A few markers with the names of the long
forgotten who left everything to find nothing
more than a place to bury every dream
or go mad listening to the wind's tedious voice.
Sagebrush somersaults across the open
plain like fragrant spinning stars of Van Gogh.
It's windy in Wyoming. Suicide weather.
No barriers to stop it. They say the telephone
pole is the state tree. Miles without the living.
Lots of drive-up liquor stores. Abandoned
mining towns. Petroglyphs of alien figures.
A few markers with the names of the long
forgotten who left everything to find nothing
more than a place to bury every dream
or go mad listening to the wind's tedious voice.
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Re: Living At The End Of The Road
I like it. I would axe Van Gogh.
I would axe " tedious voice" and stop with wind.
Nice line break on nothing. Very bleak.
I would axe " tedious voice" and stop with wind.
Nice line break on nothing. Very bleak.
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Re: Living At The End Of The Road
I agree with Ken... the Van Gogh image is good but not for this poem. Save it for something else. Love the telephone pole. Good poem... but agree the end needs a better punch line.
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- Joined: 01 Jun 2008, 09:17
Re: Living At The End Of The Road
Billy I had a thought about Native Americans somehow getting a nod in this poem. I recall some of your work referencing that topic. Just a thought. Good as is
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Re: Living At The End Of The Road
Billy this is top drawer
I know you have been concerned at your muse lately
I think state tree has been said before but I still like it,
Van Gogh overused imo
Short and sweet, you could add a little more but very good.
I know you have been concerned at your muse lately
I think state tree has been said before but I still like it,
Van Gogh overused imo
Short and sweet, you could add a little more but very good.
Re: Living At The End Of The Road
Van Gogh committed suicide. He may have had a mental illness. His spinning stars and the wind. Sorry, I think I'll keep Van Gogh. The tedious voice can go. I wasn't sure I liked that either.
Thanks for the comments.
Thanks for the comments.
Re: Living At The End Of The Road
I like the poem.
I do not find anything that should be dropped,
It is your poem, you know the best.
I do not find anything that should be dropped,
It is your poem, you know the best.
meenas17
Re: Living At The End Of The Road
Kenneth, the petroglyphs are referencing Native Americans but maybe you are wanting more than that. The inspiration for the poem was not a Native American perspective.
Thanks Kenneth Bob Frank Meena
Thanks Kenneth Bob Frank Meena