To My Old Age

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BobBradshaw
Posts: 1719
Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03

To My Old Age

#1 Post by BobBradshaw » 23 Oct 2020, 03:32

To My Old Age


Huffing uphill leaves
my legs heavy as grief,
the trees panting
as if at any moment

one will place its limbs
on its hips,
arms akimbo
like a training instructor

at the gym, his new
and elderly client
--as my ex always claimed--
a disappointment.

At home I thwack
the hi-hats in the den
every time I walk by,
the ringing vibrations

like my a-fib.
How did this happen—
decades lost, as if swept off
by a furious broom.

There are creams
that promise to erase
my wrinkles, hair implants
to recover the lost

ringlets of my youth.
Everywhere young women
pushing baby carriages
in the Japanese tea garden

look less like wives
in their mid 20s
and more like girls
who should be taking notes

in a high school
biology class.
It’s odd how koi
and the pink faces of oleander

are the subjects
I now take note of,
as if old age
is a class without grades,

and one I hope never
to drop out of.

User avatar
Billy
Posts: 1037
Joined: 22 Jun 2006, 10:56

Re: Ode to My Old Age

#2 Post by Billy » 23 Oct 2020, 04:23

Like this very much. I kind of want a different end, but maybe this one is enough.

Maybe:

as if old age
wanders over a hill

to pick a certain flower
and never returns


no, that's not it, oh well, it's your poem

meenas17
Posts: 740
Joined: 23 Mar 2014, 11:27

Re: Ode to My Old Age

#3 Post by meenas17 » 23 Oct 2020, 18:48

I can relate to this Bob.
'my legs heavy as grief', Very apt expression
I feel the same way. My legs give me lot of trouble,.
Nothing much to change.
meenas17

BobBradshaw
Posts: 1719
Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03

Re: Ode to My Old Age

#4 Post by BobBradshaw » 24 Oct 2020, 02:43

Billy, Meenas -- thank you.

BobBradshaw
Posts: 1719
Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03

Re: Addressing My Old Age

#5 Post by BobBradshaw » 24 Oct 2020, 04:42

Changed the title....not sure I like it...but open to suggestions. Best

Kenneth2816
Posts: 1261
Joined: 01 Jun 2008, 09:17

Re: Addressing My Old Age

#6 Post by Kenneth2816 » 24 Oct 2020, 08:21

Splendid poem Bob.

BobBradshaw
Posts: 1719
Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03

Re: Addressing My Old Age

#7 Post by BobBradshaw » 24 Oct 2020, 21:57

Thank you, Ken. Your opinion means a lot.

BobBradshaw
Posts: 1719
Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03

Re: To My Old Age

#8 Post by BobBradshaw » 26 Oct 2020, 04:53

The title keeps bothering me....dunno

Michael (MV)
Posts: 1731
Joined: 18 Apr 2005, 04:57

Re: Addressing My Old Age

#9 Post by Michael (MV) » 26 Oct 2020, 05:18

Hi, Bob,

Ode was rather formal & stiff

I find the revised refreshing.

likewise with

1/ to my old age

2/ my old age


😎

Michael (MV)

BobBradshaw wrote:
24 Oct 2020, 04:42
Changed the title....not sure I like it...but open to suggestions. Best

BobBradshaw
Posts: 1719
Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03

Re: To My Old Age

#10 Post by BobBradshaw » 27 Oct 2020, 08:12

Thx, Michael

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