Long Hair Named Desire

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meenas17
Posts: 740
Joined: 23 Mar 2014, 11:27

Long Hair Named Desire

#1 Post by meenas17 » 11 Nov 2020, 15:28

I am fascinated by long hair
one of my friends had,
I do not know if she still has
a very long hair, thick gleaming
reached up to the knees,

My short, soft, wavy hair
looked so poorly beside hers.
My mom plaited them when
I was a kid. I tie my hair
little above the neck

held by a small black
hair band, colour is a mix
of salt and pepper,
a privileged combination.
I tell myself.

The longing for long hair
has not been realized by me
however much I tried
to possess one, by applying
and massaging

my hair with oils in the market
which boast of voluminous growth.
In the milieu my hair fell in locks
exposing my scalp, felt terrible
during those days.
meenas17

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Billy
Posts: 1037
Joined: 22 Jun 2006, 10:56

Re: Long Hair Named Desire

#2 Post by Billy » 13 Nov 2020, 06:48

I really like the title. I think you mean, "reached down to the knees" or "reached to the knees" Up makes sound as if the hair is growing from the ground up.

Kenneth2816
Posts: 1261
Joined: 01 Jun 2008, 09:17

Re: Long Hair Named Desire

#3 Post by Kenneth2816 » 13 Nov 2020, 16:50

What Billy said. This is a pleasant poem. Feminine and calming

meenas17
Posts: 740
Joined: 23 Mar 2014, 11:27

Re: Long Hair Named Desire

#4 Post by meenas17 » 13 Nov 2020, 17:42

Billy,
Could be, but we say so In India, if I am not mistaken.
meenas17

meenas17
Posts: 740
Joined: 23 Mar 2014, 11:27

Re: Long Hair Named Desire

#5 Post by meenas17 » 13 Nov 2020, 17:43

Ken,
Pleasant comment too!
meenas17

BobBradshaw
Posts: 1719
Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03

Re: Long Hair Named Desire

#6 Post by BobBradshaw » 13 Nov 2020, 23:57

Lovely. Your imagery is good, pleasing. Enjoyed immensely

meenas17
Posts: 740
Joined: 23 Mar 2014, 11:27

Re: Long Hair Named Desire

#7 Post by meenas17 » 14 Nov 2020, 18:31

I am trying to focus on imagery as you have suggested many times,
meenas17

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