Archiving Colonization

[RamanathanSiva]

V2

We had heard stories about the Bear girl
of Kadumane. We made our trip
to the Sinna Durai Bungalow, Shakleshpur.

My daughter’s cottage had the old book
documented record of the ‘Bear Girl’ story
with illustrations.

Our cottage had the antique classic, 'Anamalais'.
It begged to be picked up from our tea tray.
What I thought was a boring book turned out to be
an interesting journal entry.

On the veranda of the Kadamane Estate Bungalow
watching the sunrise as my family went trekking.
C. T. Congrieve way back in 1860, exploring
virgin territory. First the date, the time of the day
and the weather. The number of elephants and locals
their supplies, their tent, their baggage. What
could be cultivated, where, when and how.

Their whim to bivouack.

Congrieve looked up to Carver Marsh. He named botanically
the flora and fauna ; all those species and variants. I could even
see into his head.

Their assessment. I even liked his English, a no nonsense
direct usage. Through the trees the sun had risen.

The English archived what they left behind to a dot;
deliberately turned a blind eye to what they took from us –

valuables don’t vanish into thin air.

——-///////—————————————————————————-

The antique classic, 'Anamalais' begged
to be picked up from our tea tray. What
I thought was a boring book turned out to be
an interesting journal entry.

On the veranda of the Kadamane Estate Bungalow
watching the sunrise as my family went trekking.
C. T. Congrieve way back in 1860, exploring
virgin territory. First the date, the time of the day
and the weather. The number of elephants and locals
their supplies, their tent, their baggage. What
could be cultivated, where, when and how.

Their whim to bivouack.

Congrieve looked up to Carver Marsh. He named botanically
the flora and fauna ; all those species and variants. I could even
see into his head.

Their assessment. I even liked his English, a no nonsense
direct usage. Through the trees the sun had risen.

The English archived what they left behind to a dot;
deliberately turned a blind eye to what they took from us –

valuables don’t vanish into thin air.

[Billy]

I like the poem as is. It is very effective in its undertone. I love that N can see into his mind and likes the way he writes.

[BobBradshaw]

Love the last 3 lines….

Do you need a comma after “locals”?

Knowing more about the N might make the poem more enjoyable.

[CalebMurdock]

You are telling an interesting story in your poem. As a poem, though, I'm not sure how to judge it. I understand that that doesn't help you much. It sounds very prosaic.

[RamanathanSiva]

I had heard stories about the Bear girl
of Kadumane. We made our trip
to the Sinna Durai Bungalow, Shakleshpur.


Bob,
Can I use this as an introduction to start my poem?

[BobBradshaw]

Yes. And maybe say or hint why the bear girl intrigues the N. Something that tells us about the N’s character? Maybe describe her clothes, which show her love for India’s culture?

Maybe her sense of value, her loss at having something personal stolen from her in the past? I’m just thinking off the top of my head.

[RamanathanSiva]

My daughter’s cottage had the old book
documented record of the ‘Bear Girl’ story
with illustrations.

[RamanathanSiva]

We had heard stories about the Bear girl
of Kadumane. We made our trip
to the Sinna Durai Bungalow, Shakleshpur.

My daughter’s cottage had the old book
documented record of the ‘Bear Girl’ story
with illustrations.

Our cottage had the antique classic, 'Anamalais'.
It begged to be picked up from our tea tray.
What I thought was a boring book turned out to be
an interesting journal entry.

On the veranda of the Kadamane Estate Bungalow
watching the sunrise as my family went trekking.
C. T. Congrieve way back in 1860, exploring
virgin territory. First the date, the time of the day
and the weather. The number of elephants and locals
their supplies, their tent, their baggage. What
could be cultivated, where, when and how.

Their whim to bivouack.

Congrieve looked up to Carver Marsh. He named botanically
the flora and fauna ; all those species and variants. I could even
see into his head.

Their assessment. I even liked his English, a no nonsense
direct usage. Through the trees the sun had risen.

The English archived what they left behind to a dot;
deliberately turned a blind eye to what they took from us –

valuables don’t vanish into thin air.

[RamanathanSiva]

Bob
https://www.behance.net/gallery/46458453/The-Bear-Girl