The Boy's Confession As A Man
Father, the night was always yours
and now it's mine, but I've grown old
with fright that you inflamed. Hear me.
Death is the judge. The luminous
reflections circle back and take their place
in the center of the present. I'll hold
you. Like a forgotten rock, common,
indistinguishable from all the others,
lying in the bottom of my underwear
drawer, where I kept the Playboy
January, 1964. The year I made a vow
not to be like you. All the women will say
that I'm a liar, but a nice enough guy,
just like you, in a certain shade of light.
The Boy's Confession As A Man
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- Posts: 1619
- Joined: 01 Jun 2008, 09:17
Re: The Boy's Confession As A Man
Nailed it. Title took me right in.
Couplets and killer line breaks.
Not too syrupy nor overly harsh.
Send is out , Billy.
Couplets and killer line breaks.
Not too syrupy nor overly harsh.
Send is out , Billy.
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- Posts: 140
- Joined: 09 Jul 2017, 06:34
Re: The Boy's Confession As A Man
Billy
where I kept the Playboy(.) You need a full stop there.
Kenneth has said what I wanted to say.
S
where I kept the Playboy(.) You need a full stop there.
Kenneth has said what I wanted to say.
S
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- Posts: 2692
- Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03
Re: The Boy's Confession As A Man
I like the last 3 stanzas best....
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- Posts: 1619
- Joined: 01 Jun 2008, 09:17
Re: The Boy's Confession As A n
Billy I'd like to nominate this for IBPC if
You're ok with it.
You're ok with it.
Re: The Boy's Confession As A Man
I like it, nice writing, touching.
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- Posts: 68
- Joined: 08 Oct 2017, 05:13
Re: The Boy's Confession As A Man
My kind of poem, where you don't need to excavate to find meaning and emotion.
Last 2 lines clinch it, well done. I second the nom.
Linda
Last 2 lines clinch it, well done. I second the nom.
Linda