You Arrive Like Fall, Suddenly

[BobBradshaw]

You Arrive Like Fall, Suddenly

leaving my heart thumping
like a banging shutter. You missed

the bigleaf maples that hung
like mid air vineyards in spring,

their long racemes
of yellowish green flowers

heavy as grapes. Now
they have the anemic yellows

of leaves folded
like handkerchiefs waiting

to be pocketed away. That alone
should have alerted me to loss.

Haven't the blow-wives long lost
their beautiful heads of white hair

to shearing winds?
Still, there's hope you'll stay, right?

Like the woolly mule’s ears
with her long blonde hair

you too feel at home
in the cool air,

one moment clinging to me
like a monkey flower to a fence,

as if intent on staying.
And yet the next moment

I sense you don't need roots
--that like a moon jelly,

there isn’t a rock
or a patch of soil or a man

that could ever
anchor you.

[Bernie01]

Bob---

the very title had me. and the poem did not disappoint.


You Arrive Like Fall, Suddenly


bigleaf maples


that hung
like mid air vineyards in spring,


racemes
of yellowish green flowers

blow-wives long lost
their beautiful heads of white hair



to shearing winds?
Still, there's hope you'll stay, right?

mule’s ears
with her long blonde hair

a monkey flower to a fence,
a moon jelly,


lovely frame, sense of texture, scent, color. the who, what, where when of good journalism and pom writing.

the passing season. the frailty yet beautgh of the flowers foreshadow an unhappy end.


Brett saying to the narrator of The Sun Also Rises....oh, we could have been happy.

but we and he know the answer---he says...


"yes, wouldn't it be pretty to think so,"




a poem for a winter night. to rejoice our own good luck.


bernie

[Gracy321]

Hi Bob,
Loving this piece, with its sense of nostalgia/color/fragrances threading thru' each strophe.
I've only one suggestion: right away, I couldn't help remarking on the amount of times you use the word "like". At least six or so.
Perhaps you wish to use lots of similes, so ignore me.
Enjoyed,
best, Gracy

[FranktheFrank]

One of your best poems.

Liked it.

Crafted very well.

I think Suddenly could be left out of the title.

Instead of 'like the fall' perhaps 'after the Fall'
to meet the demand for less 'like's.'

and s1:
my heart a banging shutter
thumping. That would take care of another 'like'.
It's a metaphor instead of a simile.

Just three more 'like's' remaining.

Racemes is such a lovely word, thank you.
The inflorescence of Spathoglottis plicata,
a terrestrial orchid, is a typical raceme.
Every radiating unit in this inflorescence
of a Cyperus sedge is a spikelet ...

I can't choose a favourite strophe
so many good ones
one after the other
carefully thought out
leading to the conclusion
this is such a good poem.

The whole poem a metaphor
for a footloose woman
a drifting relationship.

A serious contender for this month's IBPC.

[BobBradshaw]

Gracy, Frank... thx for your kind remarks and suggestions

[Xerxes88]

Im sure you'll tweak this, i just wanted to give you props for the parts i think work well and why

สมัครบาคาร่า

[meenas17]

it is one of your best poems, Bob.
Enjoyed.
A colourful, fragrant poem.

[BobBradshaw]

Meena, Xeres88 - thank you!